If you could change one thing about your physical appearance, what would it be? As an adult I have been asked that question a few times in my life and I get the same look every time I say “Not a thing”. I’m not sure if I get this same look because they think I am lying, conceited or that the person asking now feels self-conscious because they answered differently. I answer this way, not because I think I am perfect, but because I like me, I am comfortable in my own skin.
Growing up in a crazy, unconventional, over sharing and super loving family definitely helped develop my comfort. It’s easy to like who you are when you’re always being told that you’re awesome. It’s not until I broke into the big bad world that my confidence in my awesomeness was a bit shaken. Some people are miserable, some are jealous and some are just plain douche! I learnt that I could not change how they felt about me, but I could change how I felt. I could hear what they were saying but put up an internal buffer for hateful comments.
It is true that if you hear something enough you start to believe it is true, so why isn’t it more common practice to have daily affirmations of our greatness. How many people every day look in the mirror and pick apart what they see? How many people would you say look in the mirror and smile at what they see? Unfortunately the numbers are heavily weighted on the wrong side.
I think that most people have a skewed view of what beautiful is, an unobtainable view of how we should look on a day to day basis. It is not realistic to look or be perfect all the time. It is ok to go out in public without your make up on. And you do not need to look like a supermodel to be beautiful. What makes a person “beautiful” is when what’s inside gets to shine through. Some of the most attractive people that I have met in my life were not the “traditional” beautiful people, but the people who were comfortable in their skin and that comfort exuded into this overall confidence and THAT is sexy. Not the kind of cocky confidence, but the kind that is unassuming and effortless.
So next time you catch yourself in the mirror picking something apart, STOP! Instead really look at you and find even just one thing that you like and tell yourself how great it is. Change “wow my lips are awkward” to “wow I have big luscious lips”! Love your freckles, nose, eyes, and ears and yes even your laugh lines because you got them from laughing. Start loving you, get comfortable in your skin, because you’re going to be in it for a while!
Eventually over time you will find that you pick apart yourself a little less and smile a lot more. You might even be surprised about the new kind of attention you’re getting or the type of people you’re attracting. But, don’t be! You are a beautiful person inside an out and it’s about time that you know it!