Monday, February 28, 2011

Look What I Can Do

When we are young it is so easy to gain the attention of everyone around you by simply saying “Look what I can do!” That simple phrase gets us all the praise and adoration we need in that moment. I wonder how well that would work out for us as adults; funny thought though!

As children it’s easy to get what we want, because we actually ask for it. If were hungry we say so, if were tired you know it and if we want attention we demand it while doing cartwheels in the front yard.

There is so many times as adults in relationships that we desperately crave attention but never ask for it, never demand it. Instead we keep it to ourselves, harbour resentments or tell everyone but the person we need attention from about it.

You deserve to feel adoration, love and respect all the time for all the various relationships in your life. We so often don’t get want we want in life because we either don’t think we deserve it or we never ask for it and wonder why it never happened.

What do you mean
you can't read my mind?

Rarely in life are things just handed to us; sometimes it’s as easy as asking for it and most of the time if you want something you have to work your butt off and grab life by the horns and take control.
It’s easy to make resolutions and never follow through or complain to your friends instead of talking to your partner and telling them what you need… Or is it? Who is losing out in these situations? Who is the one left feeling the sense of failure, doubt or the feeling that something is missing?

It’s time to be honest with yourself and the people in your life about what you want and need. When you want to spend time with a friend call them and tell them you miss them. If you need some much needed alone time with your spouse, instead of waiting for them to make the move, do it yourself.

It’s ok to tell the world “Look at me!”, because you are great and deserve to be looked at. We have to remember that, for the most part lol, the people in our lives are not psychic and need a little help every once in a while to decipher our code. So go ahead help them out, you won’t regret it!

Lotsa Love,

Sunday, February 27, 2011

That’s Not Where it’s Supposed to be

When is the last time you changed your regular routine and did something new? Took a different route home, went to a different coffee shop or used a different brand of shampoo?

I always thought of myself as someone able to try new things and be open to new ideas; until a recent trip to a never before explored grocery store. I have my regular shops that I go to and over the years have been accustomed to where things are; I go on autopilot and just know where to go to get what I need. Today I went to a new store and felt lost and confused; the entire shopping experience took way longer than it should have and I left without getting all of what I went for. So either the store was badly organized or I am a little too attached to my routine.

After this experience I feel like I need to break out of my daily schedule more often and take off the autopilot. Yes there are days where routine is what keeps us together, but it’s also essential to open our eyes and try something new.

It’s funny how you can learn something new about yourself every day from simple trips to the grocery store or challenging your fears in the rainforest. Every experience regardless of the size is an opportunity to learn and grow.  Take advantage of all these opportunities and challenge yourself every day. Never let yourself stop growing or get stuck in a mundane routine; life’s much better when you’re changing with it. 

Lotsa Love,

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Are you ready?

Who would have thought that someone terrified of snakes, frogs, spiders and anything else creepy crawly could last 15 days in Costa Rica and part of that on a farm smack dab in the middle of the rainforest? I almost turned down this trip because of my fears and anxieties and I am so glad I did not. In two weeks I challenged the better part of all my phobias and came out stronger than ever. Are they cured, not so much, but I am well on my way there.

My first night in the rainforest lying in bed with my sister staring at the creepy crawlers on the wall and waiting for the lizards and snakes to find their way in, I kept thinking to myself “What am I doing here? You can’t do this! This isn’t for you!” I had two sleepless nights and that does not bode well when you are challenging yourself emotionally and physically all day. Night three finally came along and after a 6 hour hike up a volcano and 4 hours of yoga I was beyond exhausted and home sick. I even contemplated leaving paradise early.  When I took back my brain, from my emotions and fears, I realized I had to make a choice. Either I could not sleep and be terrified of everything that moves (and that’s EVERYTHING in the rainforest) or I could suck it up and enjoy being in one of the most magical places in the world. That was the first night I slept and sleep followed every other night as well.

Take deep breaths to get you through!
Then I had to deal with my fear of heights which my husband finds hilarious, he says “Babe you’re an amazon, the fall is so much shorter for you. How can you be scarred?” As if facing all my critter fears was not enough, the majority of the activities that my family had chosen for our trip where at extreme heights. The first was zip lining over the rainforest and not just regular zip lining they had to choose the one with the greatest lengths and heights.  I remember the guide strapping me up for one of the biggest lines and asking me if I was ready, I said no and he said to bad and off I went. My eyes were shut tight as I could feel the wind shaking my line and I knew there was no turning back. I forced myself to open my eyes and WOW, I am so glad I did. The view at 400 Ft. is spectacular, I never had time to be mad at the guide because I was so energized from the view and happy that he did not let me be one of the people too scared to experience this. If the zip lining was not enough we followed it up with crazy hikes and canyoneering, where they drop you down waterfalls as high as 220 ft. 

Going from being terrified to do any of the before mentioned activities to being the first to drop down the waterfall and say “Let’s do it again”, is an experience I am so glad I did not pass up.

OMG! How many feet? lol
As the days went by, I walked passed frogs without screaming and walked over bugs that before terrified me. I even left my cabin at night…lol I learnt so much about myself, how far I could come and how much I could take. It is easy to be scared; it’s difficult to be brave but much more worth it.

I am so glad I pushed myself to explore and experience everything. I was so proud of myself and have amazing memories. My fears may not have disappeared but they are definitely shrinking and I now know what I am capable of.

So the next time you’re about to say no because your phobias are holding you back, stop and think about it instead of just saying no . Think about what you’re missing out on. Start with baby steps or do like me and just jump in. Whatever your method is just try; try and work your way through those fears because there’s a whole magical world waiting for you to explore once you do!

"Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it." ~ Bill Cosby

Lotsa Love, 

Local tourist

I was able to write a post for another blog and it was featured today. Check it out, I hope you enjoy!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Show and Tell

People behind the scenes rarely get to come on out into center stage. My wind beneath my literary wings Charly helps me in all my posts, she edits and adds till my verbal explosions makes Today she has decided to write her first post on our blog and I cannot wait for you to read it. I finally get to share a bit more of my "Little Bits of Crazy" in my life. She is my sister in law, partner in crime and I am now sharing her with you.

Find Yourself Hilarious

Who knew that iron-ons
could be so much fun?
I often laugh at myself from a thought in my head before I’ve even had the chance to say it out loud or share it with someone else. (I’m laughing now.) Obviously, when I finally share that thought and people I care about find it equally as funny that just doubles my happiness. (It’s always nice to have confirmation that I am as funny as I think I am.)
I find amusement in the smallest of things which makes daily life a lot less stressful. Such as making my dad say funny things that he doesn’t understand, encouraging my cat to dance to the newest pop music (she’s really coming along, watch out Britney!) or creating themed
t-shirts for parties. I find it stress relieving to be able to exert my energy in a positive manner such as laughing.

Before Natasha went away on vacation in December I started to dread being apart for two WHOLE weeks, I requested an Amazon surrogate (she’s really tall) and she supplied me with TV show homework to pass the time. At first I thought “What a lousy replacement!” and then I began my assignment of watching “How I Met your Mother” and “The Big Bang Theory.” I don’t know how I survived without these shows before. It is such a nice break from reality when my day has gone far from perfect for me to just sink into a show that involves similar comedy that happens within my close group of friends. (I’ve been told that my husband and I are like Lily and Marshall from “How I Met your Mother.”) Often after I am finished watching the show, my previous demeanour of sulking has been replaced with an uplifted sense to push through the rest of my day.

I feel the same way when I am around my friends. They are a positive release for me and I am very grateful to have this close knit group of friends that can accept me for all of my funny, silly moments and partake in it too!

Find yourself hilarious, even if you’ve made a mistake because part of the learning is in the mistakes. If you make a mistake and you’re embarrassed, ask yourself in the big picture how much of an impact will this really have? If it has no long-term future consequences, then move on and laugh it off. You’ll feel better.

I do things that make me happy and that often leads to the people around me being happy. Laughter is contagious, and that’s one germ I love to spread!

“Virtual High Five!”


Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Be the change

When we think of bullies we picture the mean kid who would beat us up or stole from us in the school yard. I think most people equate bullying with their youth and rarely see what happens in adult life as be bullied.
There are three different types of bullying; emotional, physical and verbal. Bullying can be defined as any repeated act by a person or group that enforces power over another person or group. Think about how many situations in life that can fit in to that definition.

Bullying can happen at home, in school, at work and within your social network to name a few. We need to be confident and defend ourselves and others.  Bullying will never stop in any situation until someone says enough.

Know that the bully is in the wrong and you have every right to sit wherever you want in the cafeteria, talk to whoever you want as no one is owned or go after that promotion. In my experience with bullies, both personal and observed, the bully is screaming out for attention or trying to fill a void. This does not make it okay, but it does make the bully a person instead of a monster and he or she needs guidance and consequence.

What do you do when you see someone being bullied, could you recognize it if you saw it? Some forms of bullying are very in your face and others are slighter. In any case neither is ok and should be stopped. If you see someone being bullied don’t just stand by and watch get help or help the person yourself (be careful not to put yourself in harm’s way). If you’re being bullied tell someone about it and get it to end.

Find your voice and say no to bullying. Trust me it feels much better standing up to someone bullying a friend or stranger then just walking away. Take the power away from the bully by talking to someone and standing up for yourself.

On this day of anti-bullying be a part of the change that could save a life.  Be the good you want to see in this world. Recognize when your behaviours could be perceived as bullying and correct them not just for the other person but for yourself as well.

No matter where you are there is tons of information on the internet (just Google anti bullying), at your school or at work. There are always ways to help!

“Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke.” -Benjamin Desraeli

Lotsa Love,

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Don't let your feet hit the floor

Have you ever had one of those magical days where your feet barely find the floor? A day to veg and relax and unwind from the crazy lives we lead. If you haven’t you don’t know what you’re missing.

There are different categories of couch habitation and let’s not get this confused with being a couch potato. There is a huge difference a couch potato lives on the couch, a couch visitor uses the area as a relaxing getaway.

One of my favourite things to do when I have been working to much or out of town to long and miss my hubby and dog is too cuddle up on the couch with some of our favourite shows, movies and snacks and to only let our feet hit the floor when it is absolutely necessary and the shorter the time the better.  We chat about whatever’s going on, nap, bask in the sun and just veg out.

These days can also happen with a group of friends, instead of feeling like you constantly have to entertain or be “on” try veg’ing. I had such an experience recently and it was great. Imagine being cuddled up with a group of friends on an oversized couch, chaise lounge and giant arm chairs. Some of us reading gossip mags, taking in the sun, me reading an eccentric book about elves out loud while we all sipped on mimosas and munched on brie.  No rushed agendas, nowhere else to be and the only time we got up was for a refill of food or drink.

I think these days are highly overlooked, I think people miss the importance of winding down, of taking off your watch and not caring what the time is. Not realizing how much time has gone by till the sun has gone down and your belly is growling; to just spend a day decompressing and letting go.

I highly recommend these days; you may want to ease into it though…it can be hard to come back to the real worldJ. I like to share my couch days with family, friends and sometimes just me and my pooch Bailey. You can learn a lot about a person when you’re not trying. When no one is trying to impress anyone else and everyone is in it for the same reason these days are nothing less than magical.

Because you may think you’re getting more from life going a mile a minute, but it’s when you finally stop and take it all in that life really comes into context. 

Lotsa Love,

Monday, February 21, 2011


I've been away on a cottage getaway mini vacation and was unplugged for the most part. Sorry for the weekend without posts. I promise to make it up lol. I will resume my regular posting tomorrow. Hope everyone had an amazing weekend.

Lotsa Love,

Friday, February 18, 2011

How can I help you? Cue Douche.

WARNING! This post may be a rant! lol

It always amazes me how normally civilized people can become complete douches to people in the service industry. They go from talking in a normal tone to a condescending one in a second. Is it a chemical reaction or are some people just born with the douche gene? You know who I’m talking about, the ones who snap their fingers at servers who are obviously busy or yell at the girl at the counter at the local coffee shop because there is a line up.
 I have worked in the service industry off and on in varying positions for over 10 years, so this have given me much time to study and analyze these people.  I am definitely a strong willed person and trust me the “douchey customer” is definitely the hardest for me to deal with because they are not only impossible to please, they make your life hell and rarely tip (even if it did it wouldn’t really make it any better).
My “research” hasn’t narrowed down the “douchey customer” pay scale or class. It seems that no matter what economic group you belong to you can be susceptible to “doucheness.” I have watched countless numbers of tables interact completely normal with the company of their friends and as soon as the server approaches the table a switch is flicked and there is no going back.
 I have served tables where I can go over clear the table ask if anyone needs anything, attempt to make eye contact with someone because I’m being ignored, finally walk away and then within seconds get the snap/dirty look combo and get grief for not coming to the table for refills. This happened regularly. I have both seen and dealt with first hand things that no one else in any other industry would be expected to deal with…ok maybe customer service agents, they get the raw end of the deal on many occasions.
 So, this makes me wonder, what makes these people think that they can act the way they do? Do they think less because of the position or title? Are they so miserable in their own lives that they need an outlet or do they just not know any better? It wasn’t acceptable in kindergarten to treat your fellow classmates this way or the teacher, so how did they miss this very important lesson on manners when it’s taught so young?
 I used to always say that I thought everyone should be made to work in the service industry at some point in their lives in order to be allowed to enter a restaurant, maybe then they’d change.
I have to admit there are some people out there that should not be working in the industry and in that case speak with the manager, ask for another server. But treat them like the human being they are. Some of the smartest, most down to earth, nicest people I have ever had the pleasure of working with have been in the service industry and I bet anyone of them would have their fair share of horror stories.
I think it comes down to the saying we were taught as children “treat others as you wish to be treated”! I know we all have our bad days and need outlets for them, but trust me it should not be the counter girl or bartender. Remember they are the one who control your food/drink fate and I wouldn’t leave my order in the hands of a mistreated server.

Jackie Robinson

Lotsa Love,

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Fork in the road

What is the best course of action, the best decision in life? I don’t think that anyone will ever know. When you come to that proverbial “fork in the road” how do you decide which way is the best road to take?

Some of life’s decisions are easy; they are clear-cut and a no-brainer. Some of the forks in the road can be a bit fuzzier and then there are the ones that can mentally tear you apart.

The ones that can tear you apart are horrible; you spend all your time obsessing, weighing options and can make up your mind a million times over always coming to a different conclusion. Instead of enjoying all the options we have in life, we obsess until the decision timer runs out and we have to make a choice.

Of course all the outside forces in our lives don’t always help. Yes, it is great to have people you can go to when you need help making the “right choice”, but sometimes 'having too many people in the kitchen' only creates an unproductive mess. It is fine to go for advice, but in the end you are the one that has to live with your decision, because you are the one that's making it. What might be right for someone else, may not be right for you.

What about the times when there is no clear winner? All the options can be right and maybe for different reasons. One could give you more time at home, one can take your further away but looks like it might be a better opportunity and then there is always the safe bet. Is the safe bet necessarily the best bet? How do you choose?

As we get older the choices harder in our lives, especially when it comes to choices that can affect the whole family. Are you selfish or selfless, do you take one for the team or does your team back you 100%?

In the end it is our choice, we have to work through it and make a choice that we can be happy with and are willing to live with. Make the choice that has less what if's, make the choice that has the more pros, make the choice that will leave you with a good feeling at the end of the day.

Don’t get stuck at the intersection of life, pick a direction and go with it knowing that somewhere along the way there will another opportunity at the next intersection. 

Lotsa Love,

Wednesday, February 16, 2011


Tonight coming home from my unexpectedly busy day all I wanted to do was to cuddle on the couch or crawl into bed and get swept away into an early slumber. I got home about an hour before we were expected to be at my sister in laws for date night, a wonderful weekly ritual, feeling a little rushed I was glad that I decided to grab dinner on my way home. Finally sitting at home on my couch, belly full, I actually considered not partaking in date night; until I realized that would just be crazy.

Within seconds of walking through the door I knew I was where I should be. In a couple of hours with the best of friends we addressed someone not getting a job, getting a job, grant proposals, galas, birthday parties and many more topics that cannot be talked about on this blog. Everything goes; from the serious, funny, right out there strange and even a revolving door of jokes about why one of us happened to be wearing cranky pants today.

I would love to one day tape record the conversations had on date night and share it all with you, I just don’t know that anyone could believe that this was actual dialogue and not manufactured or to be a fly on the wall. I am guessing it would be weird to see from a stranger’s perspective. We speak in code, food tends to get thrown, much snorting ensues and that is all before a single beer is cracked.  

By the end of the night our bellies were both full from great food and sore from hours of laughter. The cranky pants were taken off and we were all ready to face the rest of the week. I shudder at the thought of making it through a week without my date night indulgence.

So here’s to great friends and good laughs, to go through life without either would be a horrible misfortune.  “Cheers”

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
- Anais Nin

Lotsa Love,

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

You’re Amazing

I received an e-mail from a follower and friend asking if I could write about something she wanted help with. This is what she asked, “Could you write about feeling comfortable around those who you don't feel comfortable around or are afraid to be yourself around?” I contemplated this for a while trying to figure out a response, how to answer such a difficult question. I don’t know that I can answer the question, but maybe this will help.
 I have learnt in life that we cannot make people like us or even be nice to us, but if we’re not ourselves are we really giving them a fair chance? I have tried before in past relationships (friends, family and lovers) to be what they wanted me to be, to “FIT” into the mold of what I thought they wanted and that never worked out for me. I was always left feeling hurt and misunderstood.
 Through reflection I was able to figure out who I wanted to be and start on my path to become that person (it’s a very long path). Once that was decided, it didn’t necessarily make things easier, but I developed clear boundaries and stuck to them.
 I have surrounded myself with people who not only love me, but like me for me as well, the real me. When I am around new people, I try and read them to figure out what level of “Tasha” they can handle, but I am always me.
 I know it is impossible to eliminate people who don’t see eye to eye with you or even like you from our lives, but we can change how we let them affect us. You should never be afraid of being yourself, start with loving who you are and go from there. Figure out your boundaries and stick to them. Everyone is nervous or uncomfortable at some point or another but we shouldn’t be in our own skin.
 Sometimes in life we get into patterns or situations where we end up feeling like we have lost our identity. If this is the case, take what you have learnt, add to it and grow the new you. Know that every situation, encounter and decision is an opportunity to learn about ourselves and grow.
 You are an amazing, smart, giving person; you just need to see that and the rest will fall into place. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you love you. You may just find that the more comfortable you are with yourself, the more it will reflect in your relationships with others.
 Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.  Aristotle

Lotsa Love,

Monday, February 14, 2011

V Day

Valentine’s Day; a day so many look forward to and many more dread, a day when hearts can be filled with joy and happiness or loneliness and heartbreak. Today is one of those holidays that can inspire a multitude of feelings all dependant on what your relationship status is, how you feel about it, and if your partner remembered the holiday or not.
 We are taught from a very early age that Valentine’s Day is about love, candy and sending someone a card asking to be your valentine. Well what if you don’t have or want a valentine?  We get programmed to think that this day has to be perfect, romantic, special, but why?
 I have seen so many happy couples fight over Valentine’s Day every year, when on any other day they are perfectly happy.  What about this day makes us so crazy? Is it that we want to prove our love, show it off, are our expectations to high or are we lacking that specialness in our day to day lives? Shouldn’t love be celebrated every day, when did we put a price tag on it?
 What if we expressed our love daily and made every day the day of love? Do like Saint Valentine and hand write expressions of love to your sweetheart, hopefully not from a jail cell ;).
 Now I am not bashing Valentine’s Day, I think it is great that the world has a day dedicated to love. It would be easy, seeing as I’m married, to gush about Valentine’s Day and how special we should make it, but I don’t know that I feel that way about it. I’m more of an everyday love kind of girl! I love flowers, chocolates and gifts, but to me they are more special on a day that everyone does not feel pressured to give them. Like when my husband just surprises me with something special because he was thinking of me, that means more…to me. WARNING- Not everyone feels this way.
 Maybe I feel this way because I can remember what it felt like in high school and not get a candygram or be the only single girl in my group of friends and have to hear about all the things my girlfriends were expecting and then how excited they were or disappointed they were with the outcome. I think the ones in love sometimes forget that the whole world necessarily isn’t.
So for all you singles how about making it a day to love you, your family and friends. For us in relationships express your love all the time and give your partner a break, nobody’s perfect. Enjoy the day and the meaning behind it, but don’t stress about perfecting it. Go with the flow, enjoy love, no matter who you’re loving. Because I am pretty sure that when Saint Valentine died so young lovers could marry he did not envision people turning this day into anything but an expression of happiness, freedom and love. He would want this to be a happy day, so let’s make him proud. Whatever you end up doing today, just go with it, because sometimes when we expect nothing at all we get everything we wanted!
For, you see, each day I love you more, Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.
Rosemonde Gerard

Lotsa Love,

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Shiny Happy People

In life we come across a smorgasbord of people, good and bad. The great thing is that ultimately we have the choice to choose who we want to surround ourselves with, people who make us happy or the people who don’t.
I have had relationships, family, friends and otherwise, that have been a negative force in my life; people who are a constant source of drama. The type of relationships that take and take until you don’t feel like you could possibly give to them anymore without having to compromise who you want to be as a person.
When I was younger I dealt with it because I was told it was polite and that even if the person causing you grief is family, they are family so deal with it. But, shouldn’t it be the other way around, shouldn’t your family be your biggest supporters? A safe place where you can share your feelings and concerns and have it be taken seriously? Yes everyone needs time to vent, release and interpret how they are feeling. But when you have that one person in your life that is constantly a downer or a cause of irrational drama, you start to wonder why they’re in your life at all.
You can be in relationships where you love the person and yet they are not good for you. If you keep these toxic people around they can poison your life and cause you to lose a piece of yourself; that can be very difficult to get back. So instead I have decided to surround myself with “Shiny Happy People.” Now I am not talking about people who spew out sunshine at an alarming rate. I am talking about genuine nice, happy people that may sometimes have off days but overall are supportive, helpful and loving.
It is beneficial to surround yourself with relationships that better you and you better them. People who you can be the true you without false pretenses or judgment. WARNING: These people are not perfect. They will have their bad days or horrible events that they go through, but that’s when you have to step up to the plate and be their support system. It’s a two way street, and if you both travel in the right direction, your friendship can be a pretty exciting road trip.
Finding those great, healthy, symbiotic relationships can take a while. But the search to find people that are effortless to be around is an endeavour worth exploring. Once you do find those relationships it makes you wonder what you were ever doing before.
There is already an abundance of negativity in the world, so why would you permit it in your life when you have the choice to stop the drama?  
It is important to remember that “Everyone can make you smile... but only certain people can make you happy.” ~Unknown.
Lotsa Love,

Friday, February 11, 2011

Rubber or Glue

We have all in some point in our lives run into negative people; you know who I’m talking about, naysayers, the people who just can’t help but bring others down. When you’re in an amazing mood and they just have to poop all over it. Why do they feel this incessant need to do this?

I have had these great moments or days “ruined” by these types of people, until I realized I was the one letting them ruin it. We all have our choices, them to throw negativity our way and us to be either “Rubber or Glue”. Will you let the negativity bounce off or stick to you?

Once I decided that I didn’t want to let these people ruin my day or crush my dreams, I started picking apart why they could be so negative. In some cases the people were just negative and miserable and unable to be helped until they were willing to help themselves. Some people had a somewhat valid point in the mist of the negativity, but just were not getting the message out clear or needed maybe some finesse.  Other times the negativity was coming from a very unlikely source and the person was just having a horrible day and took it out on me or my idea, they are much easier to deal with because normally asking them what’s up resolves the issue.

How many times have you heard someone say I used to dream of… or I always thought I could be…? Somewhere along the line these people gave up on themselves. Now granted not everyone’s dreams are realistic and sometimes they change.  When I was younger I wanted to be a lawyer, singer, supermodel, gymnast etc… You get the point. My dad clearly pointed out that singing would never be my career as I would break too much glass, being a lawyer drifted away as I realized how much schooling was involved and that just wasn’t for me and well the supermodel bit I have yet to let go…lol. My dreams may have changed and developed with time but at some point or another they were MY DREAMS.

No matter how farfetched your dreams are or how many times they may morph or change all together they are still yours and you should be proud of them. How many successful people have been told in their lives that they couldn’t accomplish their goals or dreams? We wouldn’t be where we are in today’s society if everyone believed what people said when they were told they couldn’t do it.
Rock Star Dreams!

So regardless of what your dreams may be, wear them proud. Don’t give up on them! It may take you a little longer to get there and they may change along the way, but be that person you see in the mirror.

Be the Rubber and not the Glue. Go ahead and strive to be the true you!

Lotsa Love,

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Crazy Hazy Days

Ever have one of those days where it seems like you got so much done, but not nearly enough; one of those days when you have no time for you? With everything we pack into our lives those days seem to be more common than they should.

Today was one of those days for me, it wasn’t necessarily crazy that I didn’t have a spare second; it was more about free time for just me. It is easy to get wrapped up in family, friends, work and all the activities we deal with in our day. All these things are great part of our days and cannot be avoided, but we need to find balance for some us time.

One of the things I like doing in my day for me is writing and writing this blog. I take some time out of the day and let my creativity go. I get to be alone with my netbook and make it a sort of ritual. So today when it was getting late and I had yet to write I thought of maybe skipping a day. When I thought of that it did not sit well and I felt like I was missing out on a part of my day I love so much.

It is easy to say we can put things off till tomorrow, writing, exercising, reading or whatever it is that you do for you in your day. It would have been easy to not write today and say it was because I was busy and move on till tomorrow. What happens though is that we become ok with putting that particular thing off and it can eventually fade away from our schedule all together.

So I ask you to make sure to take time in your day for you. Give yourself time to unwind, to process your day. Write in a diary (blog or book), read, take a long bath or go for a walk. Taking that time for you, fitting you in your schedule will be much more rewarding then putting you on the back burner.  

Whatever you do make sure it’s for you, go ahead and give you that daily gift. You’re worth it!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Time Machine

In hindsight the better choice is always so much clearer. It is so easy to say I regret that decision or I wish that never happened or the dreaded “What if?” It’s so easy to dwell on what could have been instead of dealing with what is now and moving forward.

Laughter is the best medicine!

 We all go through things in life, (some more intense than others) that we would like to have wiped clean from our personal slate. As hard as some of these incidents are to go through and how difficult they are to face; they do sculpt who we are today, for better or worse.
 Going back and changing a moment could impact the whole course of your life. There are a ton of things in my life that I would have rather not have dealt with, but I did and came out a stronger, better person because of it. If I made different choices or avoided situations I have no idea where I would be today or the person I’d be.
 When I was younger I was angry at situations and held on to that anger for a long time, but that only was hurting me. I had to choose what I wanted out of my life and look towards those goals instead of dwelling on past upsets or failures.
 However, it is easier said than done. I am not in any way discounting what anyone has been through and suggesting you just get over it. Some people go through unimaginable pain and that can take a long process of healing before someone can successfully move forward and that is warranted behaviour. We are not robots, our feelings drive who we are as human beings and although sometimes we feel pain, were counterbalanced with emotions such as joy, love, passion, etc.
 I chose to move forward and I now like who I am. I live without regrets because I know that they would cause me unnecessary emotional weight that I’m not willing to take.  If you are one of those people holding onto your regrets imagine that each one is a brick you carry on your shoulders. Depending on your regrets you could get bogged down pretty quickly. Present life has its own challenges; you don’t need to carry around past challenges too.

Deal with what gets thrown your way!

 Some people don’t like where they are in their lives so they choose to blame the past and dwell on regrets. But, isn’t it so much better to focus on the great things you have or can have in the future instead of dwelling on the past? Letting go of regrets will help you to move forward and you will start to feel a lot lighter and freer to make positive choices.
 So say “Thank you and good riddens!" to the past and “Good morning Sunshine!” to the bright future that is before you.

Lotsa Love,

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

The grass is not always greener

How many times in your life have you looked at someone else and said I wish I had what they have or they don’t know how good they have it? Those two statements may be very true, but when we are standing on the outside looking in our perspective may be a bit blurred.

I think that in today’s society of want want want, we very rarely take time to enjoy the little things in life. We are so busy looking at what everyone else has we are missing everything great in our own lives.  When we focus so intently on what we don’t have or something that we think we should have because of some internal dead line we simply are missing the moment that we are in.

Enjoy all the great relationships!
We all have ideas of where we would like to be or things we wanted to accomplish by a certain point, but if that’s all we are focusing on everything else around you becomes secondary. Why can’t we enjoy what we have and go along for the ride? Is what we have not enough?

I remember a conversation with a friend who I thought had everything and yet when it got down to it she thought the same of me. It wasn’t until we started really getting into the conversation that we both realized that neither one of us has it all! Everybody has their faults and things in life that aren’t perfect, what does matter are how you handle these imperfections. Do you covet what thy neighbour has or enjoy your side of the fence?

Enjoy all the great moments!
Sure we all have things in life we wish we could change or have “by now”. I learnt from different personal heartaches and watching friends go through painful situations that if we focus solely on what we want and don’t have we miss and could possibly ruin what we have now. So Instead I focus on my amazing relationship with my husband and my great support system, all the things in my life that other people would wish for. What will be will be, there is only so much we can do before we drive ourselves crazy.

In closing we can have goals and wishes; they are great and keep us driven, if they are positive. Take time to stop and smell the roses instead of always comparing yourself to everyone else. Enjoy life, the gifts you have and the people around you. Because even though life could always be better, it could also be worse.

Lotsa Love,

Monday, February 7, 2011

Rinse and Repeat

Cranky and don't know why?

Have you ever woken up in such a bad mood and heard someone say “Well, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed, didn’t they?” and then they point at you and laugh at their apparent clever remark like it’s the first time anyone has ever said it. I have and let me tell you hearing that you’re cranky when you are cranky does not help; especially when you have no idea why.
I used to say I am cranky just because and never really examined what could be the cause. I would go about my day content with being cranky and never caring why. I seriously thought maybe people do just wake up on the wrong side of the bed. I figured I would go to sleep the following night and hopefully wake up on the right side to start another day, rinse and repeat.  Sometimes that worked fine, other times it didn’t. Over time when I started to be more in tune with why I was feeling what I was feeling, I started to question and reflect. It also helped that I have a husband with a habit of counting to three and unwillingness to just let me be cranky.
Normally the cause is accumulation of problems that I have yet to deal with or an interaction with someone in the close past that still is sitting uneasy. So what do you do? Deal with the issue or let it lye?
I have learnt for me the best thing is to go through what could be bothering, venting normally works. Talk to someone who’s okay with your belligerent ranting and figure out what the cause is. Sometimes identifying the cause and validating why I am cranky is solution enough, sometimes not so much. If just discovering what it is that is causing your morning melt down is not enough you then have to decide how it is to be dealt with and that can be the hard part. It all depends on what the cause is, is it a person, work, family, the options are endless.
What’s important is that you are working through what is causing you grief. The faster we do this the less time we give the cranky bug time to work its way in and cause more damage.
For me this has sometimes led to difficult conversations, a life change or even a realization that whatever was causing me this discomfort was not big enough a problem to let bother me and to just let go. Whatever the situation was, every time I worked through this problem I learnt more about myself and that’s never a bad thing.
So the next time you find yourself on the wrong side of the bed, instead of being ok with being cranky, take some you time or vent to one of your closest friends and discover the root cause. Get close to your feelings, learn what makes you tick. Because yes it is okay to be cranky every once in a while, but wouldn’t it be better to just feel happy?

Sunday, February 6, 2011


When is the last time you turned your cell phone off? Avoided your computer or gaming system for a full day? Most of us, including myself, probably cannot come up with an answer.
Get a good laugh playing games with friends!
 Living in today’s world means we are constantly plugged in. That is how we network, keep in touch with friends and keeps tabs on our children (haha).  It makes it easy for us to always be connected to everything that is going on in the world today.
 What about all the things we do disconnected, unplugged? Going for walks, playing with your dog, reading a good book or going to the park seemed to have been replaced.  Instead of soaking up the fresh air, we collect electronics.
 I think there are a time and a place for everything by creating a healthy balance of both. Maybe a fun day outside in the snow followed by snuggling on the couch and a good movie.
Balance is one of those much strived for things in life that is (unfortunately) rarely achieved, but why? Do we not try hard enough, are we too tired from work that staying plugged in is easier or are we addicted to the instantaneous connection we get from being plugged in?
Like anything else baby steps are always best when making life changes. Start by turning your phone off for an hour, walking your dog with your phone off in your pocket, avoiding Facebook for a day or saying no to video games. Taking these baby steps will eventually introduce more and more unplugged activities.
Have fun unplugged!

 So next time you’re going to play a video game, think about reading a book instead. Join a walking club and maybe even make new friends. Run off to the cottage and don’t allow any electronics for the whole weekend. Whatever it is that you choose to do, remember baby steps are the keys to success. 

Lotsa Love,