Our Miracle

What do you do when a dream becomes reality? When something you thought for so long wouldn’t, couldn’t happen and then it does? In my scenario I cried, I cried the moment they placed my baby boy on my chest and I heard him for the very first time.

Our dream for the longest time was to have a baby and after over 5 years of trying and being told IVF was our only option we were crushed. Knowing that we would probably never be able to afford the only way we could have a baby together was heart wrenching and drug me through a very sad time. Luckily The New HOT 89.9, an Ottawa radio station, decided to hold a contest called Win a Baby. I entered despite my hubby saying we would probably never be chosen, I had a feeling and was going for it. Then we found out we made top 5 and we were ecstatic but being so close to winning the IVF treatments was beyond nerve racking.  Finally after what felt like the longest week EVER, HOT 89.9 brought in all 5 couples on October 11 2011 and made an announcement that changed all of our lives… We all WON!

I think because not a lot of people know about fertility treatments and movies make IVF look like a 1 day process everyone thought the baby would be instantaneous. But it is a process, and can be a long one at that. We met with our DR at the Ottawa Fertility Centre (OFC) in November and it was decided that I should lose some weight to increase my chances of success. Let me tell you, the best exercise and diet motivation for me ever.  I lost 20lbs and started my round of IVF in January and finished in February. We were lucky enough to meet and stay in contact with the other couples from the contest and went through it all together, an amazing support. Finally in came to the day where we took our pregnancy test at the clinic, I was beyond nervous, but my family and friends had all decided already that it had worked and I was pregnant. Well they were right, I received a very excited phone call from one of the nurses at the OFC and from that moment on our dream started coming true.

Nausea, exhaustion, hip and back problems, nerve issues, months of non-stop Braxton Hicks and sleepless nights couldn’t bring me down, I was having a baby! Every pain or discomfort just made the pregnancy so real for me and every ultrasound brought tears to my eyes. Our little guy was a mover from the get go and I got to feel his flutters fairly early, flutters didn’t last long and pretty soon my belly was dancing all over the place.

To say that we loved our little man before we even knew he existed would be an understatement, but nothing could prepare us for what we would feel as he and my belly grew or for the day we met him.  We were hoping that after so many Braxton Hicks that I would have a quick labor…lol NOPE. My real Contractions started at 5am Thursday morning and he was born Sunday at 11:51am. The nurses all laughed at what a good mood I was in and all made comments about the fact I was smiling in between contractions; even when the 4 different types of drugs we tried wore off and would no longer work. My answer was simple “I’m happy because I know this means I finally get to meet him”. To me every contraction was a step closer to my boy and I was so ready to meet him.

Just a few hours after Knox was born.

The moment finally came where my sweet Knox was born and they placed him on my chest. I was flooded with emotions as he let out his cry and the nurses dried him off. Then we got to do skin to skin and he reached his little hand towards my face and raised his head and opened his eyes… I was done. I couldn’t hold back everything I was feeling and our sweet little man brought momma to tears. No one can prepare you for what you will feel the day you meet your baby.  He’s a week and a half old now and he still brings momma to tears.

It’s amazing to think how many people took part in helping us through our journey. Our amazing family and friends who no matter what were always there for us through the good and bad. The new HOT 89.9 who created such an amazing contest and decided that they couldn’t just choose one couple, thanks to that decision there are now four babies in this world that would otherwise not be.  The Ottawa fertility centre who took such great care of us and helped create our miracle.  And all the absolute strangers and followers who through the contest or this blog came to know our story and supported us through every turn.  We will never be able to thank everyone enough, how do you say thank you for giving us the greatest gift of all?

Knox Ian Napoleon Derouchie

So now Ryan and I are exploring a new chapter of our Fairy Tale, Parenthood. This should be interesting! Can’t wait to share it all with you!

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Pea soup kinda day

When it's cold, gloomy, damp or just plain miserable out what makes your day? Something you think of that means instant comfort?

Now that the cooler weather is upon us and slippers are out, comfort items are a must! I personally am a pea soup and fuzzy blanket kinda girl. When it's one of those days the soup goes on and the couch calls my name.

What works for you? Could it be snuggles with a pet, a comfort food or maybe a hot cup of tea?

I like when the icky days fall on one of my hubbies days off, this means sleeping in, cuddles and a day of comfort food! Even before I was pregnant food has always been at the top of my comfort list, now even more so.

So I kind of look forward to the days where you don't want to do anything and baking warms your home and your heart. Imagine if everyday was perfect and sunny we would constantly be busy and never get to enjoy a rainy day on the couch.

So maybe we can see a miserable day as an opportunity to stay in, get cozy and recharge. Bake those cookies you've been planning on for weeks, watch a movie with the family in the middle of the day, bust out a board game or just veg. Take a queue from mother nature and use a day to recharge and unwind.

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

2 Week Countdown

What do you do when the one thing you've wanted more than anything in the world for so long is just around the corner? When all that you've hoped, dreamt and wished for is almost in your arms?

12 weeks

Well after over 5 years of trying, a radio station contest, 1 round of IVF and 38 weeks we are almost there. Our little guys due date is coming up just around the corner and we couldn't be more excited!

Its been a bumpy road, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Even though I may have complained along the way, the struggle has made me appreciate every little moment. From the nausea and exhaustion in my first trimester, to the hip and back pain in my last; its all made this experience so real and every symptom and sign has reassured me along the way that I haven't been dreaming.

24 weeks

We are absolutely ready to meet our little miracle and I cannot wait till the day finally comes where my labour is real and I get to meet him; one false labour and a ridiculous amount of braxton hicks have me prepared. The nursery is done, bags are packed and he has a amazing amount of people who cannot wait to meet him.

We are so beyond grateful for the support we have received from family, friends and complete strangers. It has been sometimes overwhelming, but always welcome.

36 weeks

Getting to watch my sweet niece grow over the past 5.5 months has made me even more ready, excited and anxious to have our little one in our arms. If our little guy is anything like our hilarious little Harper we will be doing great!



Knowing that even if he goes overdue in less than a month we get to meet our little man is almost more than I can handle! So until he decides its time or the Dr decides he's overstayed his welcome I will continue to dream and wish for him.

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

A difference a month can make

What a crazy busy month it has been, so busy that I unfortunately had to let my writing slip. Well i'm hoping that things will settle a bit (lol) and ill have a bit more me time.

I have made it to my third trimester and am now just over 7 months. The baby is moving like crazy all the time, i'm not sure when he sleeps, but I love it. I'm hoping that what they say is true, Happy pregnancy Happy Baby.

Ryan and I had a blast picking out our baby registry at Babies R Us. It took us 2 hours and we were both overwhelmed by the end, but had a great time picking everything out. Hopefully our little guy is happy with mom and dads picks.

I've been busy working with the Ottawa Fertility Center and the other committee members planning out the Expressions of Infertility art competition starting August 23rd. Knowing what struggling with infertility feels like, this contest means a lot to me and I cannot wait to see how it takes shape.

We started working on the nursery and I cannot wait to see what it will look like all together. Ryan has started painting and our furniture is finally in. We are lucky enough to have a best friend as a designer Diana from Indulge Interiors is helping us make sense of my jumbled visions of my nursery. 
Everything is slowly coming together and I couldn’t be happier. November feels like its just around the corner.

Ryan and I had an amazing holiday together and celebrated 6 years married. This year we celebrated with the baptism of our God Daughter, what a great way to celebrate love. It was an amazing day filled with family and friends. Its exciting to think that next year our little guy will be here celebrating with us.

Its crazy to imagine that in just a few short months story time will be Ryan and I reading to our baby and not my belly. That we will finally get to hold him in our arms. Give him tons of kisses and love. I cant wait to meet him and to have him meet all the great people in our life.

With art competitions, baby shower, planning my maternity leave and everything else that life throws at us, I'm sure November will be here before I know it. Until then my dreams will be filled of the mystery that is, who our little man will be.

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Taking time

In the busy lives we lead today how many of us actually take the time to appreciate the people in our lives that make things great? Most of us are so bus, wrapped up or ignorant to how great we actually have it. I think in a society that always wants more its easy to look past what we have that is so amazing, the great people in our lives.

There will always be things that we want to change, things we can complain about or things that may just suck, but on the other side there will always be good that can be focused on.

I have always believed that I am incredibly lucky when it comes to the amazing people in my life, but there are moments when I take a step back and get to truly appreciate how lucky I am. You hear stories of awful in-laws, mean siblings, untrustworthy friends or people who just don't have any kind of support to be seen. When I hear these stories or when I share some of my stories is when I get a glimpse of how great I really have it. I not only have the people in my life that celebrate the good, they are around 24/7 no matter what the mood. Through my struggles, strengths, most joyous moments or epic fails they are always around to cheer me on. When I speak about my wonderfully supportive husband, crazy loving family, generously warm in-laws or fantastically special friend's people tell me how amazing that is and I believe them.

Coming into incredibly unknown territory, parenthood, I am not nervous or scared, I know the kind of love and support that I get will guide me through all the interesting moments that my new adventure will take me. Knowing the kind of support I get makes me incredibly grateful each and every day.

I think everyone should take time to really take it all in, really appreciate all the people in there lives that make it what it is. I think far too often the people get overlooked and we can tend to focus on the things instead.

So take a moment and take stock of the fine people in your life. Who makes you laugh, smile or is willing to share a cry?

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Who will our baby be?

As my pregnancy progresses I cant help but ask the question, who will he be? I'm sure that I'm not alone in this, that every parent to be has the same question. The absolute wonderment of the little human you are creating and will soon meet.

I wonder what he will look like, what features he will get from me or Ryan. Will he have Ryan's nose or my smile? Seeing as Ryan and I both have dark features, I'm assuming the baby will be the same, but then again who knows.

More than features I'm curious about who he will be, what his personality will be like. Will he be funny, kind, gentle, warm or serious? Will he like trucks, dolls, worms or tea parties?

After waiting so long to get pregnant and have our very own baby the wait of meeting him seems just too long. Even though time has been flying, I just can't wait for the day my little boy is in my arms and we finally get to meet the angel who picked us as parents. I'm sure the day will be here before we know it and ill be wondering where the time went, but until then I get to enjoy all the moments of pregnancy.

I have been lucky enough to feel him move fairly early on and now frequently. He's a mover and that makes me wonder if he will be once he's out. The ultrasound tech, at our last appointment, warned me that if he moves half as much as he does now when he's out ill be in trouble, ill be running lol. I fear that she may be correct. I'm not quite sure when he sleeps; all I know is he sure likes to move.

So until the day that he decides its time to meet us and I get to learn who he is first hand; I can day dream, hope and wonder.

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

And it's a.... Boy or Girl?

Nearly at the half way mark of my pregnancy we finally get to have the big ultrasound, the ultrasound where you get to find out if your baby is a boy or girl, if baby cooperates. Now not everyone wants to find this out, as they like the surprise. My husband and I on the other hand never wait to give gifts and cant stand waiting for news. We decided right away that we wanted to know what our little bundle of joy would be and have been counting down ever since. 

All guesses are in and most people are saying that our little bundle will be a boy, with the few that are standing by the girl prediction. We get asked all the time if we have a preference either way and most people don't believe us when we say that we don't. After waiting for so long and never knowing if our dream of being parents would come true for us a baby is the greatest gift no matter what the gender. We are so excited to find out the gender so we can decorate and shop, shop, shop. Time seems to be flying by and before we know it our little bundle will be here.

So did baby cooperate? Are we thinking hues of blues or pinks?

Our little bundle is a… . Boy! We are over the moon excited and are now talking baby names, nursery themes and planning out are shopping excursion for our little man. He more than cooperated and was moving around non stop. Even the ultrasound tech said he he's like this when he comes out I'll be running lol. 

Getting to the half way mark of my pregnancy flew by in a flash, I am very much so enjoying being pregnant, but cannot wait for the 2nd half to fly by so I can finally meet my precious little angel that we have been waiting for, for oh so long.

Lotsa Love,

Natasha