Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Being Couple “A”

Words probably cannot justly describe the range of emotions we have felt since The New Hot 89.9 deadline for applications closed on Wednesday September 28th, but I’m going to give it a try anyways.  

A couple of weeks ago I received a frantic call from my mom and sister telling me that I was going to “Win a baby”. Once I calmed them down they told me about the contest announcement that I missed while at work and I immediately went to the website downloaded the application and let myself think for a moment; “What if? Could we actually be parents?’

My Husband, Ryan, and I have been married for over five years now and have been trying to conceive for just as long. We have never been pregnant and after a while knew something just wasn’t right. When I was seventeen I had my appendix removed and then with complications was in the hospital off and on for six months, two more surgeries and a stay to deal with some adhesions (sticky scar tissue). I was told then that my surgeries would not affect my ability to have children and not to worry. My family doctor suspected that my scar tissue might be just that, our problem. After multiple tests and trying every imaginable options (diets, supplements, you name it) we were referred to a fertility clinic. Our family doctors suspicions were accurate, my scar tissue (adhesions) are restricting movement of my fallopian tubes and not allowing my eggs to get where they need to be; on top of that we found out Ryan has low sperm motility (slow sperm), one of these problems alone could be cause for lack of conception, little own both. During our first consult we were advised about IVF and I was told about exploratory surgeries that can laser remove scar tissue, possibly ridding me of my fertility problems, this gave us hope. After our specialist got a hold of my surgery records he called me in for another consult and advised me that the risks of surgery were too high and he couldn’t do the surgery. Being told that our best and maybe only shot of having a baby would be to go through IVF a procedure that would cost us approximately 10,000 dollars and being stripped of our hope Ryan and I were devastated. We are very lucky to have amazingly supportive family and friends who helped us get through the tough news and think positive.

Knowing the amount of entrants would be great we were hopeful but unsure about our fate in the win a baby contest. As soon as the clock hit twelve noon on Wednesday and the contest deadline closed my heart raced and I anxiously clutched my phone. Thursday came , the original date hot 89.9 was supposed to notify couples and start the Fertility consults, and I was up at the crack of dawn clutching my phone and frantically checking my e-mail. I had told myself that if we hadn’t heard anything by noon that we probably wouldn’t hear. My husband and I sat quietly watching the clock neither of us wanting to make eye contact once the clock was past noon. Family was over in a flash and we were consoled, we had date night that evening with our closest friends to try and take our mind off of not making top five. After finally accepting we didn’t qualify I see on twitter Friday that Hot 89.9 hadn’t announced the top five and that they hadn’t chosen yet either. I immediately contacted friends and family letting them know we still had a chance, I on the other hand having convinced myself otherwise still felt like we didn’t make it. Sunday was nerve racking and Monday morning was Crazy! I was just getting ready to jump in the shower when my phone started to ring, an unknown Ottawa number. My heart almost exploded. I answered the phone and heard Mauler from the Morning hot tub, it was happening we were couple “A” and one of the top five finalist; anyone who heard the morning calls knows how I handled it. We were overwhelmed and really still today have moments where we don’t believe it’s true. One of the best parts was telling everyone we were in the top five, seeing and hearing our family and friends reactions was amazing.

With over 400 applicants to this contest alone and 1 in 6 couples suffering from infertility in Ontario, I am so glad that someone, The New Hot 89.9, finally stepped up to help. Help raise awareness and help a couple have a baby. Never in my time, have I remembered anyone speaking this loud about fertility problems, it is a painful and private issue, but without speaking about it we can’t do anything to fix it. Many other countries and even Quebec fund IVF treatments for couples who suffer with fertility problems, so why doesn’t Ontario? The government funded a study in 2009 where they were advised “That they could not afford not to fund IVF”, additional studies have been done stating that the government could save up to 600 million dollars by funding IVF treatments through OHIP, so again why don’t they? Conceivable Dreams is the Coalition for OHIP for IVF, they have a website where you can get information on the matter and an easy to send letter to the government advising them this is an issue that needs to be addressed! If you know someone like Ryan and I who is having problems or you suffer from fertility problems, or even if you want the government to save 600 million dollars in health care cost; please speak up and tell the government you want IVF funded by OHIP!

Regardless of how the contest ends we will always be thankful for our supportive family and friends who may end up with carpel tunnel, the awareness this has brought to this issue and Hot 89.9 giving us our hope back, because it’s a dark place without it.

If you have any questions please feel free to contact me, I will try to help as best as possible.

Lotsa Love,

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