Parent knows best!

One thing that I noticed as a first time parent is that everyone wants to offer up advice, solicited or otherwise.  I am sure that all this advice is well intended, sometimes it can be overwhelming and contradictory to what your planning for your little one. On top of information given from other parents there is tons of information you can access through books, apps and online articles. So how do you filter through everything and get down to whats right for you and baby?

I love to read, so I have read countless articles etc... on everything labor, parenting and baby related that I can get my hands on. There is a lot of information and a lot of it is contradictory and opinion based. It took me a bit to figure it out but once I did its been way easier. My super secret is... Do whats right for you and baby! It sounds simple, but can get complicated.

Sleeping like a baby

Just like anything else I want to make a decision on I research, ask for opinions and collect as much data as I can. As a first time parent it can be overwhelming, no one wants to make a mistake. Once I realized that its hopeless...lol That everyone makes mistakes then I relaxed a bit and got down to figuring out what works best for us. Just like grownups, babies have there own personalities, likes, dislikes and schedules. I struggled with sleep for months until after lots of reading decided to try Knox on his belly, as he would only sleep an hour or two on his back. Once flipped he slept 3, then 4, then 7 and now 8-10 hours a night. Miracle??? Or just the simple fact that mommy is a belly sleeper and so is baby? Now I know that the current sleeping position for babies is back, but I know that changes regularly and made a choice based on Knox. He could lift his head from birth and by the time I decided to put him on his belly could lift and turn his head, roll over and scoot, this and the fact that I have a angel care baby monitor made me feel safe and secure with my choice to put Knox on his belly. My now functioning brain thanks me lol.

There are tons of decisions to be made and even more opinions ready to be shared. Do you circumcise, make your own food, breast feed, cloth diaper, how often to do tummy time, how much stimulation, when to introduce bed time routines etc etc etc... The list is endless!  Best advice I got was to have a plan and be absolutely prepared to toss it and start fresh. I am glad I got and took this advice as I needed it during labor and with some of my decisions so far as a parent.

My Happy Boy Loving his food

I had every intention to breast feed Knox until at least six months and then introduce foods and wean. However my super baby has a super appetite and I was breast feeding him every 1.5-2 hours and he never really seemed satisfied. This can become exhausting when all you seem to do is breast feed. So at just a week over 4 months we introduced Knox to solids. Again we made this choice after much reading and knowing that Knox was absolutely ready to eat (being able to hold himself up and showing all signs he was ready). Once he was introduced to food the way he breast fed became different, almost aggressive. So after months of non stop feeding and an aggressive eater I decided to start weaning him earlier then intended. At first I felt guilty and selfish that I was weaning him before 6 months, but then I saw how great Knox was doing on the bottle and how much more time Ryan was getting with him. I feel much better about my decision and Knox loves his food and is already trying to hold his own bottle and drinking out of a sippy cup.

As new parents it can be easy to get pressured into doing what your told is best for baby, but shouldn't you be who knows your baby best? If every baby was exactly the same then it would make sense to treat them exactly the same, but they are not so shouldn't we care for them as individuals and make choices as we go? This is how i've approached parenting and I have a happy, healthy baby, so i must be doing something right.


Follow your instincts and do whats right for you and baby, if that choice doesn't seem to work make another. Learn and grow with your baby and you both will be much more relaxed and happy at the end of the day.

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

How do you balance all your roles?

With how busy a world we live in its unrealistic to think that we would only have one role, one purpose in our lives. So as we get older and the roles start adding up, how do you keep balanced?

Recently I have adopted some very important roles aunt, god mother and mommy to my beautiful baby boy. I take these new roles very seriously and love the person they are making me. But what about my old roles, what about who I was before I adopted these new roles? She is still there just hidden under breastfeeding, up all nights, playtime and lots of baby kisses.

At first finding a balance wasn't a big concern of mine, my main concern was figuring out how to be a mom. Knox (my baby boy) is a big eater and not so much a big sleeper, so for the first couple of months it seemed like all I did was nurse, cuddle and try and get a wink of sleep when I could (which is why there was no writing happening lol). Now Knox is four months old and its getting easier to manage and rediscover all my other roles.

My sweet boy Knox

With such an important role as mommy it can be easy to forget that i'm also a daughter, sister, wife, friend, confident, writer, lover, cousin, niece and very important to remember i'm my very own person. So how do I do it, how can I manage? Well thankfully I have an amazing support system and people who love me who have no problem asking for attention or reminding me that I need some me time too. Knox is just so darn cute its hard to step away from the mommy role.

Its important to remember who you are to everyone else in the world, but its also important to remember who you are to yourself. I can see how easy it is to get lost in a new role, how it can completely consume you. So if your in that spot, feeling consumed, step back and analyze the situation. Acknowledge your feelings, its totally normal to feel overwhelmed in a new role. Start small, take little you moments in the day, call your spouse just to say hi or I love you,drop by your friends for a coffee, take up one of those offers for a babysitter, try to get a glimpse of all the things you loved to do before the big change. When we adopt a new role, no matter what it is, we will never be the exactly same person as we were before, we've changed, grown and evolved into anew breed of you. But remember in evolution the thing that evolves doesn't get replaced or changed completely, it slowly adds to itself or removes something to make itself a better being. So add, change or remove but don't forget that you are multi dimensional and more than just one thing.

All your roles make you,  so give and take, ask for help, love all of you and embrace the ever changing creature that is you!

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

Sleep??? Yes Please!

All new parents have experienced sleep deprivation and varying levels, depending on the little ones eating/sleeping patterns. What gets interesting is the things we do when we are deprived of sleep for weeks and things start to show up where they are not supposed to be. What do you mean diaper cream doesn't go in the fridge?

I asked friends of mine what they have done when up late at night with feeding's and diaper changes. Most of the answers where very similar, misplaced items. Milk in the cupboard and cereal in the fridge, diaper cream in the fridge, making something to eat and forgetting about it and going back to bed or forgetting to put a diaper back on the baby (that would be a mess).

Personally I haven't misplaced anything in my fridge, yet, but I did misplace a item. My husband went downstairs to switch out Knox's laundry to the dryer and came back up washer going again and a diaper in his hand. Ryan walked up to me with a neatly bundled up used diaper, I'm thankful I close them up tight, and a big smirk on his face. In the middle of the night I managed to throw the diaper in the wash, instead of in the diaper genie. I have now learnt to open the lid of the diaper genie before commencing a middle of the night change, as to remind myself which basket I need to throw the dirty diaper in. I am still being teased for this.

You start to learn tricks to make things go quicker or easier for you. I have a jug of water and a glass on my kitchen island, so that I can grab a drink on the way by to do a diaper change. Snacks are also readily available on the island, breastfeeding can leave you hungry and thirsty in the middle of the night. Everything I need for middle of the night changes, including new outfit, is out on the change table ready for me.

I've gotten really good at games on my iPhone and have almost mastered most things with one hand; its amazing the things you can get done while breastfeeding.

I am hoping to in the near future be less sleep deprived and aim for bigger than 2 hour sleep chunks. But until my little guy decides he likes sleep better then food, and he loves to eat, I will continue to fumble my way around at all hours of the night getting bye on little sleep. I cant say that I really mind our 3 am mommy, Knox snuggles.

If you've been down this road before share with us your mishaps in the wee hours of the night. What has ended up in fridge or washer?

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

Our Miracle

What do you do when a dream becomes reality? When something you thought for so long wouldn’t, couldn’t happen and then it does? In my scenario I cried, I cried the moment they placed my baby boy on my chest and I heard him for the very first time.

Our dream for the longest time was to have a baby and after over 5 years of trying and being told IVF was our only option we were crushed. Knowing that we would probably never be able to afford the only way we could have a baby together was heart wrenching and drug me through a very sad time. Luckily The New HOT 89.9, an Ottawa radio station, decided to hold a contest called Win a Baby. I entered despite my hubby saying we would probably never be chosen, I had a feeling and was going for it. Then we found out we made top 5 and we were ecstatic but being so close to winning the IVF treatments was beyond nerve racking.  Finally after what felt like the longest week EVER, HOT 89.9 brought in all 5 couples on October 11 2011 and made an announcement that changed all of our lives… We all WON!

I think because not a lot of people know about fertility treatments and movies make IVF look like a 1 day process everyone thought the baby would be instantaneous. But it is a process, and can be a long one at that. We met with our DR at the Ottawa Fertility Centre (OFC) in November and it was decided that I should lose some weight to increase my chances of success. Let me tell you, the best exercise and diet motivation for me ever.  I lost 20lbs and started my round of IVF in January and finished in February. We were lucky enough to meet and stay in contact with the other couples from the contest and went through it all together, an amazing support. Finally in came to the day where we took our pregnancy test at the clinic, I was beyond nervous, but my family and friends had all decided already that it had worked and I was pregnant. Well they were right, I received a very excited phone call from one of the nurses at the OFC and from that moment on our dream started coming true.

Nausea, exhaustion, hip and back problems, nerve issues, months of non-stop Braxton Hicks and sleepless nights couldn’t bring me down, I was having a baby! Every pain or discomfort just made the pregnancy so real for me and every ultrasound brought tears to my eyes. Our little guy was a mover from the get go and I got to feel his flutters fairly early, flutters didn’t last long and pretty soon my belly was dancing all over the place.

To say that we loved our little man before we even knew he existed would be an understatement, but nothing could prepare us for what we would feel as he and my belly grew or for the day we met him.  We were hoping that after so many Braxton Hicks that I would have a quick labor…lol NOPE. My real Contractions started at 5am Thursday morning and he was born Sunday at 11:51am. The nurses all laughed at what a good mood I was in and all made comments about the fact I was smiling in between contractions; even when the 4 different types of drugs we tried wore off and would no longer work. My answer was simple “I’m happy because I know this means I finally get to meet him”. To me every contraction was a step closer to my boy and I was so ready to meet him.

Just a few hours after Knox was born.

The moment finally came where my sweet Knox was born and they placed him on my chest. I was flooded with emotions as he let out his cry and the nurses dried him off. Then we got to do skin to skin and he reached his little hand towards my face and raised his head and opened his eyes… I was done. I couldn’t hold back everything I was feeling and our sweet little man brought momma to tears. No one can prepare you for what you will feel the day you meet your baby.  He’s a week and a half old now and he still brings momma to tears.

It’s amazing to think how many people took part in helping us through our journey. Our amazing family and friends who no matter what were always there for us through the good and bad. The new HOT 89.9 who created such an amazing contest and decided that they couldn’t just choose one couple, thanks to that decision there are now four babies in this world that would otherwise not be.  The Ottawa fertility centre who took such great care of us and helped create our miracle.  And all the absolute strangers and followers who through the contest or this blog came to know our story and supported us through every turn.  We will never be able to thank everyone enough, how do you say thank you for giving us the greatest gift of all?

Knox Ian Napoleon Derouchie

So now Ryan and I are exploring a new chapter of our Fairy Tale, Parenthood. This should be interesting! Can’t wait to share it all with you!

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Pea soup kinda day

When it's cold, gloomy, damp or just plain miserable out what makes your day? Something you think of that means instant comfort?

Now that the cooler weather is upon us and slippers are out, comfort items are a must! I personally am a pea soup and fuzzy blanket kinda girl. When it's one of those days the soup goes on and the couch calls my name.

What works for you? Could it be snuggles with a pet, a comfort food or maybe a hot cup of tea?

I like when the icky days fall on one of my hubbies days off, this means sleeping in, cuddles and a day of comfort food! Even before I was pregnant food has always been at the top of my comfort list, now even more so.

So I kind of look forward to the days where you don't want to do anything and baking warms your home and your heart. Imagine if everyday was perfect and sunny we would constantly be busy and never get to enjoy a rainy day on the couch.

So maybe we can see a miserable day as an opportunity to stay in, get cozy and recharge. Bake those cookies you've been planning on for weeks, watch a movie with the family in the middle of the day, bust out a board game or just veg. Take a queue from mother nature and use a day to recharge and unwind.

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

2 Week Countdown

What do you do when the one thing you've wanted more than anything in the world for so long is just around the corner? When all that you've hoped, dreamt and wished for is almost in your arms?

12 weeks

Well after over 5 years of trying, a radio station contest, 1 round of IVF and 38 weeks we are almost there. Our little guys due date is coming up just around the corner and we couldn't be more excited!

Its been a bumpy road, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Even though I may have complained along the way, the struggle has made me appreciate every little moment. From the nausea and exhaustion in my first trimester, to the hip and back pain in my last; its all made this experience so real and every symptom and sign has reassured me along the way that I haven't been dreaming.

24 weeks

We are absolutely ready to meet our little miracle and I cannot wait till the day finally comes where my labour is real and I get to meet him; one false labour and a ridiculous amount of braxton hicks have me prepared. The nursery is done, bags are packed and he has a amazing amount of people who cannot wait to meet him.

We are so beyond grateful for the support we have received from family, friends and complete strangers. It has been sometimes overwhelming, but always welcome.

36 weeks

Getting to watch my sweet niece grow over the past 5.5 months has made me even more ready, excited and anxious to have our little one in our arms. If our little guy is anything like our hilarious little Harper we will be doing great!



Knowing that even if he goes overdue in less than a month we get to meet our little man is almost more than I can handle! So until he decides its time or the Dr decides he's overstayed his welcome I will continue to dream and wish for him.

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

A difference a month can make

What a crazy busy month it has been, so busy that I unfortunately had to let my writing slip. Well i'm hoping that things will settle a bit (lol) and ill have a bit more me time.

I have made it to my third trimester and am now just over 7 months. The baby is moving like crazy all the time, i'm not sure when he sleeps, but I love it. I'm hoping that what they say is true, Happy pregnancy Happy Baby.

Ryan and I had a blast picking out our baby registry at Babies R Us. It took us 2 hours and we were both overwhelmed by the end, but had a great time picking everything out. Hopefully our little guy is happy with mom and dads picks.

I've been busy working with the Ottawa Fertility Center and the other committee members planning out the Expressions of Infertility art competition starting August 23rd. Knowing what struggling with infertility feels like, this contest means a lot to me and I cannot wait to see how it takes shape.

We started working on the nursery and I cannot wait to see what it will look like all together. Ryan has started painting and our furniture is finally in. We are lucky enough to have a best friend as a designer Diana from Indulge Interiors is helping us make sense of my jumbled visions of my nursery. 
Everything is slowly coming together and I couldn’t be happier. November feels like its just around the corner.

Ryan and I had an amazing holiday together and celebrated 6 years married. This year we celebrated with the baptism of our God Daughter, what a great way to celebrate love. It was an amazing day filled with family and friends. Its exciting to think that next year our little guy will be here celebrating with us.

Its crazy to imagine that in just a few short months story time will be Ryan and I reading to our baby and not my belly. That we will finally get to hold him in our arms. Give him tons of kisses and love. I cant wait to meet him and to have him meet all the great people in our life.

With art competitions, baby shower, planning my maternity leave and everything else that life throws at us, I'm sure November will be here before I know it. Until then my dreams will be filled of the mystery that is, who our little man will be.

Lotsa Love,

Natasha