Babe Lessons - Stark Naked

Who as a child has not taken part in the freedom of escaping the diaper change and running off wild with not a care in the world?  From my mom’s recounts of my own childhood, to siblings and cousins and even friends parents reliving embarrassing stories about stark naked runners all have the same key idea; no shame or body issues. Shame and body image issues are things that are taught and observed, not something you are born with.  Could you imagine as a child standing waiting for your bus in your neon tight biker shorts and tank top looking at your friend and asking “do these shorts make me look fat?” or avoiding playing because it would mess up your hair “sorry I can’t play ball with you, I just did my hair”; your probably laughing at the image right now because of how absurd the idea is. I cannot ever remember worrying about what I looked like as a child; I was too busy being a child! In most of my family’s pictures of me I am most certainly looking dishevelled but I also look like I’m having the time of my life and smiling from ear to ear in every picture. So at what age do we stop striping down because we are hot and want to run through a sprinkler butt naked or when is it decided that we have to worry about our weight and appearance? I am not an expert in child psychology, nor do I know the answer to that question, what I do know is that it is way too early and children are not coming up with it on their own. Could you imagine “OMG Janet is by far the fattest grade two there is, what is she wearing?”?

Children are incredible observers, they hear and absorb more than most people give them credit for. Simple learned habits that children pick up from people in their lives and with media being focused on the super thin and perfect it’s a scary fact that it is almost inevitable that children will grow up with insecurities. I’m not saying that we should all drop our clothes because we feel like it or become obese because we don’t care; I am however saying that moderation and self-love and not loathing are key ingredients.  Teaching and demonstrating that beautiful isn’t a mould and that there is more to a person then the outer shell.

We need to realize that nobody is perfect, so to strive for constant perfection is like striving for constant failure. Your body is yours for life, so get used to it, yes be healthy and make smart choices, but do not fall a victim to pressures that set people up for failure and possible addictions and disorders. It breaks my heart when I hear a child make comments about their weight or being fat or teens talking about how they haven’t eaten all day on purpose because they want to lose weight. I have been a witness to amazing people falling victim to eaten disorders because of twisted views of being perfect getting out of control and that person ends up being lost to the disease that is far from pretty or perfect.

We cannot ever dream of trying to fix other peoples views until we fix ourselves and that is when I think we can take notes from babies and small children who have yet to be tainted by unrealistic standards. We need to not only take steps but giant leaps and bounds back to our earlier year views of ourselves. When is the last time you looked at yourself and were completely happy with what you saw? When is the last time you walked around naked or even were naked in front of another person without hiding in the dark? If we all had a person who followed us around all day with an airbrush then I would say sure your expectations to look like someone whose job is to always look like that and has been touched up by magazine editors is completely justifiable, but until then we need to step back and take stock in what’s real.  To me and many others I have talked to about similar topics someone who is happy and smiling and secure is way more attractive then someone who is so done up that they are afraid to move and are obviously incredibly insecure with themselves.

Am I always super secure with myself, no, I have my bloated hormonal hard on me days like most people do. But do I starve myself, do I cut other people down to make me feel better or have unrealistic goals of how I should look? NO! I like who I am and I know that no one is perfect, I think that people’s imperfections are what makes them unique, we have all seen the movie step ford wives and that does not end well…, sure I feel like I could lose a few pounds, but I know I will never be a size zero, my love affair with food would never allow that… nor my 5’11 body frame.

Let’s make positive changes with our own views of ourselves and what beautiful is so that someone day there will be a generation of children who will never be upset about their being butter on their bagel or counting the calories of everything they eat and will never have to know what an eating disorder is. Take this lesson from the babes and learn to love you and everything about you.

Start by not caring if someone is watching you and have fun instead of trying to look like you’re having fun; as a child I never cared if someone was watching me, I was far too involved in whatever story I had created for myself in my make believe world.

Leave the house without make up, I promise there is not a force field preventing you from doing so.

Go one day without thinking a negative thought about your appearance, do it I dare you, see if you can.

Idolize someone for the person they are and not their perceived outward perfection.

Start by taking these baby steps in the shoes of babes and learn to unconditionally love yourself all over again, it’s a love affair you won’t want to miss. 

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Do it for you!

When in a couple, when dealing with family and friends; sometimes we start making choices based on what other people like and not what we like. So how do we know when to make choices to make everyone happy and when to make us happy?

Being married for over five years now most of my decisions are our decisions, which is perfectly fine with me. I know that Ryan is the person I will spend the rest of my life with so of course I want to do things and make choices that make him happy.

But a part of me remembers the girl I was before; that made choices on a whim, chopped, colored and styled her hair however she wanted. Dressed for her and only her; and decorated/painted however she felt like.

Bangs For me! lol

As part of a mature couple you have to submit your major decision making to the couple, these big life decisions are made as a unit. And for the most part most of my decisions are a we thing. However, no matter how much Ryan may protest, I still cut my hair, get the occasional bangs (which he hates), dress for me and occasionally add in a girly throw pillow or two.

I hear “I can’t do/wear/say that I’m a mother” or “I love those shoes, but I don’t think my husband would approve of them.”. Absolutely our roles are incredibly important, Husband, Mother, Daughter, Brother, Friend; but don’t forget that you are you as well… a man or a woman. So even though I’m incredibly proud to be Mrs. Derouchie, I also remember I am Tasha as well.

I’m not saying to ignore your parents, partner or friends on major decisions or even the minor ones. What I am saying is to remember when hearing everyone else’s opinions to take yours in to account as well. If you see a cute pair of loafers you know everyone else but you would dislike, get them you’re the one wearing them… If you love yourself in a bob but your honey loves your hair long, every once in a while indulge yourself and chop that hair, it grows back. You’re out shopping with the guys and you see something that would make the man cave complete, pick it up as a treat to you…how bad can it really be?

In life it can be easy to get caught up in pleasing everyone else, that sometimes we can forget that in order to make everyone else happy we need to be happy. So go ahead…Get happy!

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Friends in new places

As a child we make friends faster than we can tie our laces; were BFF’s in a matter of minutes…Friends at first site. Somewhere along the line as we get older and more stuck in our ways most of us seem to forget that we can make new friends and that there is a whole big world out there filled with interesting people to meet.

I think part of the issue is when we get older we fear more; we become defensive and put our guards up. Strangers who talk to us while out are “strange” and our alerts go up; we rarely strike up a conversation little own make eye contact with someone we don’t know.  We fear rejection where as a child that never crossed my mind.

We make excuses like we are too busy, so there is no way to fit anything or anyone into our lives, our lives are fine the way they are why do we need to make the effort to make new friends?

BECAUSE! Every new person that we meet teaches us something new; about ourselves, people and gives us the opportunity to teach as well.

I love my close BFF’s; I couldn’t imagine my life without them. But do we all share every interest or are we all going through the same things in life? No, that’s what makes a collage of friends so interesting. You are all different and bring a different dynamic, a different flavor to the group. So why not add another, try a different flavor combination?

I just recently had dinner with an amazing group of women, my Win a Baby top five winners. Other than meeting for the first time at the radio station and chatting through Facebook, this was our first time all spending time together. What could have been a quick and awkward dinner between strangers was in fact a three hour long amazingly comfortable dinner between friends. The time flew by and I know I left dinner happy and excited by what’s in store for my very near future. We may have been brought together by very unordinary circumstances, but we chose to exchange information and we all make the effort to stay in contact.

I’m not saying to talk to everyone you meet or befriend every stranger you pass by. What I am saying is open yourself up, put yourself out there and see what’s out there.  Meet new people, have new experiences and break out of your bubble. Let someone new in or 4…lol If you have a hobby join a group or talk about in on twitter or Facebook it’s amazing the people you will find that have the same hobbies as you. If you’re dieting join an online group and get support from people going through it with you. If you’re at a bookstore and you see someone struggling to decide to buy a book that you’ve read give them your opinion.

Open yourself up and you’ll be amazed at all the new adventures and opportunities that open up for you.

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Accessorize with personality

With so many people focused on clothes, purses, shoes  and all other materialistic accessories it’s easy for our personality to be brushed aside and the focus put on our great new look rather than our great personalities. So why don’t we accessorize with our personality first and if you did what would you showcase?

We put so much emphasis on what we’re wearing that it becomes way more than just a great sense of style, it’s the girl with the LV purse, great UGGs or fabulous makeup/hair. People have started to replace personality traits with fashion items when describing a person; when did that happen? So much time is spent on how we look and if people are going to like how we look rather than if people are going to like us for who we are. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather be known as the women with a great sense of humour, rather than a great pair of shoes.

Compassionate, Trustworthy, Giving

So what if you were stripped of your trendy clothes, accessories, makeup and hair products; the way you wake up in the morning is the way everyone would see you. What personality traits would you accessorize with? Are you cheerful, considerate, punctual, unselfish or courageous? What about creative, dynamic, personable or trustworthy?

Don’t get me wrong I like shiny pretty new things, but I also like knowing a person for who they are and not who they are wearing. My hope is that when I meet someone my personality leave’s more of an impression then what I was wearing and that I take away an impression of who that person was in return.

How fantastic would it be if we all spent as much time working on ourselves as a person as we did working on our look? If we all accepted that an accessory is just that and we are the main attraction? I personally think that the world would be a much better place, what about you?

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

P.S Write down your top three favorite attributes or traits in the comment section and share with everyone how wonderful you are!

Keeping "Love" Sexy

Whether you’re struggling with conceiving, been together for a long time or are just in a personal rut; it can be very easy to leave out the sexy part of “Love”. So what do we do when we get busy, are upset or just in a funk?

In my quest to try and get pregnant I got completely lost in calendars, cycles and rules of trying to conceive. It got to the point where my husband pointed out that he felt I only wanted to have “Love” if it was a scheduled baby making activity. I was so determined and focused that I completely left out spontaneity, effort and sexiness. That was not my intention, but I got completely lost in my need to have a baby.

I know this isn’t an uncommon issue with couples trying to conceive and I know it’s not just an issue with wanting to have a baby. When we aren’t feeling our best; emotionally or physically we can forget that there is another person in our relationship who we are neglecting. In many cases when we’ve been in a relationship for a long time, we can forget the sparkle that should be included in “Love”!

Personal stress, unhappiness with one’s self and even boredom can lead to not feeling sexy yourself. I know that if I don’t feel sexy I’m much less apt to wanting to put effort in or even thinking about ”Love”.  But is it your partner’s fault that you’re feeling that way? It’s up to us to feel good about ourselves and opening conversation with our loved one about how we’re feeling can resolve a lot of issues. Yes a person’s compliments or advances can encourage us in feeling a certain way, but ultimately how we feel about ourselves, how we see ourselves is going to be the deciding factor in feeling sexy.

So what can we do?

If it’s a personal issue, take a deep look at why you’re feeling the way you are.  Talk to someone about it; a professional, friend, family member or even…your partner. It can be very easy to get into a funk or a rut. Personally I am comfortable with myself no matter how I look (I rock a jumping jammer like nobody’s business lol), however I notice that when I’m exercising and eating well I feel better all around; my energy levels are up, I’m happier and I just feel great.  

Sometimes we can lose our identities; we become a spouse, parent or get consumed by our jobs. If this is the case take your identity back, remember you are more than a title; your also a women or man. If it’s been so long you forget who you are, create a new identity; who do you want to be and work towards it.

Stress can be a huge sexy buster! If its work stress, why are you bringing it home; Is it your spouse’s fault you had a deal gone bad? If it’s a home stress talk it out and remember that “Love” is a great stress reliever.

If you are trying to conceive and are attached to a calendar try and spice it up. I know it’s hard but try and bring some sparkle back into the stressful experience of trying to conceive. Light candles, play some sexy music and remember why you want to have that baby; because you love your partner and want to create something special together, so make the experience magical instead of mechanical.

With my upcoming IVF treatment around the corner and every bit of my life about to be scheduled I know that it will take effort, spontaneity and magic to keep our relationship sexy. I know you’re thinking “Tasha what’s not sexy about needles, hormones and scheduled “Love”?” lol right?

It can be easy to get caught up in life and get complacent; but try and remember the spark that first attracted you to your partner.  Remember when you used to shave every time you thought you might see them, always made sure you looked great and courted your spouse? Well they do too and they miss that. I love that when you’re in a certain part of your relationship you are comfortable with each other, my hubby and I watch movies in jumping jammers lol. But I also think that we need to keep the sparkle in our relationship regardless of the length of time we are together.

So…If you’ve lost your sexy, bring it back! Bust out that lingerie, dust off those candles, play some sexy music, buy your honey a gift just cause you were thinking of them and remember that sometimes the little things are the ones that count the most. Listen to what your partner is saying and keep those lines of communication open. Because what fun is “Love” if there’s no sexy in it?

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Flight or Fight?

When we are fear stricken by our phobias do we face them or accept that they are a part of who we are? No matter how silly or ridiculous some phobias may seem to outsiders the fear is very real to the person experiencing it and can even be debilitating. So how do we deal with the phobias and the people who just don’t understand?

Heights, small enclosed spaces, snakes, spiders and frogs (yes you read that last one right) are on my list of things that terrify me. Most people understand most of my fears; however my fear of frogs tends to get more laughs then understanding and comfort.

I almost gave up a trip to Costa Rica because of my phobias, knowing that everything I’m afraid of would be in my face and a lot bigger then home made me say no to an amazing trip the first time asked. It wasn’t until a few glasses of wine and my mom and sister coaxing me that I finally said yes to an amazing experience. Once in Costa Rica, I barely lasted a few days; we were smack dab in the middle of a rain forest on a biodynamic farm and were literally living with creepy crawlies. I was terrified to sleep and with a heavy schedule of yoga, crazy volcano hikes and other extremely exhausting activities I was physically and emotionally drained; missing my hubby I almost booked a flight home cutting my 15 day trip extremely short. I had to tell myself “ok so either you can suck it up and try to enjoy paradise or you can run home and never know what you are capable of”. Well I sucked it up and tried all the activities I originally said no too; zip lining over the rainforest, rappelling down a 350ft waterfall, crazy hikes and exploring the rainforest. I am sure I gave the night guard years of laughter seeing me trying to be brave and venturing outside of my cabin past night fall, screaming and running from frogs, snakes and giant bugs. But I did it and was actually able to sleep through the night.

I think I can...I think I can!

Since my trip; my fear of heights is a lot better and little spiders don’t terrify me anymore, I’ve made some great progress with those fears. However my frog fear is still as strong as ever. I cannot even rationalize it to myself. I am well aware that I am very big and they are very small and that (the ones in Canada) they can’t hurt me. But, when I see one my heart starts racing, I get anxious, feel like I’m going to cry or scream and if I lose track of where it’s gone I have to flee the area. This is why I don’t garden…lol

In my experience, both facing my fears and accepting them has worked for me. I think the best advice is to listen to your body, know your limits, which ones you can test and push and which ones are there for a reason. I’m glad I was pushed to go zip lining and challenge my fear of heights, the rush I got from flying through the air above the rain forest was amazing, and it was utterly breathtaking. However if someone tried to push me into a situation with frogs I would lose my…after I was able to breathe again.

If people never changed, the world would be an incredibly boring place. We evolve, “grow up”, move on, our tastes change and we experience life, this is what makes us so unique. What defines us can change, so why can’t our fears?

Whether you’re afraid of squirrels, june bugs, snakes, needles, garden gnomes or frogs; know that it is your fear and its ok. Don’t let people make you feel bad about having a phobia, regardless if they can’t understand it.  Challenge yourself and grow; but know it is ok to be you, even if that means running scared from a frog!

Lotsa Love,

Natasha

Jumping In

In life we have opportunities to put ourselves out there and possibly get hurt or stay safely in our bubble without risk. How do you handle these situations?

I am a firm believer that if you don’t try you’ll never know! Sure you can get hurt along the way, but if you never try and miss out in a way aren’t you hurting yourself by omission?

When it comes to this topic my husband and I have different views, which in some cases is good because we can pull each other in to meet in the middle.  He likes to play it safe and I not only jump right in, I DIVE; leaving my heart on my sleeve.

In some cases my hopes have been high and my expectations were left unmet; in others they were met and beyond. I feel like every experience good or bad just adds another layer onto who we are. We learn, grow and experience a full range of emotions.

Recently (like this past week) I entered my husband and I into a local radio stations contest The New Hot 89.9 Win a Baby. The contest closed yesterday and the top 5 finalist get a call or e-mail today to start the process. To say it lightly I’ve been a bit on edge…lol Do I desperately want to get a call? Yes! Will I be hurt if I don’t? Yes! Will I regret doing it? NO! This contest has brought amazing light to infertility and has been a great push for the government to fund IVF treatment. So even if we don’t get the call :( there will still be something incredible that comes out of this, awareness. Maybe the government will take a hint and catch up with what’s happening to its population and do something.

So even though I may be hurt in the process, if you don’t try, don’t put yourself out there; how will you ever know? 

Take a chance, live life and sometimes don’t just jump in….DIVE!

Lotsa Love,

Natasha 

Got Anger?

Many people think that anger is a bad thing, but I think anger (like any other emotion) is just our body trying to tell us something. If we can catch it before it takes over and just listen to what it is telling us we can really learn something from the experience.

I don’t know how many times I have had a conversation with my husband that goes a little something like this; me “Ahh I don’t even care anymore, I’m tired of talking about this!” This leads to him chuckling and proving that once again he may have a point by saying “Yes you do, if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be angry about it”.  I would never admit it to him (expect for when he reads this, hi honey) that he’s right. I wouldn’t let something or someone stress me out or anger me if I didn’t care about the person or situation. There have been times when I’ve been so hurt and angry about a situation and it is only then that I realized how much I cared.

Anger is a tricky emotion and I say it’s tricky only because most people don’t know how to handle it. We bury it, misplace it, push it away ‘claiming’ we’ve forgotten it. But eventually, an incident will spark that previous memory to explode onto the surface making the situation far more complicated. Some people hold on to anger so long that long after the situation is passed they are still being poisoned by the effects of holding onto it, causing themselves way more damage and exasperated energy then had they dealt with it when it first happened.

It can be easy to deflect or misplace anger onto another person or situation, because we are not willing or don’t know how to dig deeper and figure out the root cause. Anger is an emotion that gets worse when avoided, so I recommend not too… I see anger as a volcano; it can only stay dormant so long one day it’s bound to erupt.

I have held on to anger before because I didn’t know how to say the words I needed to or wasn’t sure how the outcome of the conversation would end up. We cannot predict how things will go, but I have seen firsthand what it’s like to hold on until you cannot any longer and that is not pretty.

I always try to approach each anger situation with explaining how my feelings were affected in the process, hoping that the person I am speaking to will react empathetically rather than defensively. Striking someone with negative remarks or low blows because you’re angry (eventhough it might feel great at the time!) will only complicate the issue and cause further pain on an already strained relationship.

Like any other emotion we need to look within and find out the why; why am I angry? When we start to decipher the scenario ourselves we can work though it on our own, sometimes severe venting is required and then there is the times when the only way to resolve the anger is by expressing your feelings with the person they are directed act. I cannot tell you how it will work out in the end, but I do know that it’s a lot better than holding on and having it eat away at you.

Use anger as a tool, as a compass to let you know when something is not right and bothering you. Get connected to why you feel the way you do and have healthy conversations rather than explosive freak outs. If we get connected to all of our emotions and realize where they come from and why we feel the way we do the world will be a lot less confusing and you’ll feel overall more relaxed and empowered that you can handle any situations that are thrown your way.

Replace blame with inward reflection and words of feelings and anger will be a much easier emotion to tackle.

Lotsa Love,

Tasha

Day off dilemma

When the work week is done and you’re not running to classes, sports, meetings or events how do you choose to spend your days off?

Our work weeks are packed enough but we still add on events, fundraisers, birthdays and classes that an actual day off without plans and responsibilities are rare. When these days finally grace us with their presence how do you spend your time?

Do you catch up on left behind chores from the work week and get in a bit of spring cleaning? Even though I know this is what I should be doing with my free time I hate to give myself over, my rare free time, to cleaning and organizing. I feel like I need to rebel sometimes from the never ending pile of things to do or I may go insane. It’s no fun being responsible and “grown up” all the time anyways.

Do you catch up on your hobbies or practice a craft? Painting, knitting, guitar or writing can be a nice distraction from the day to day hectic schedule that many of us lead. But I know many people that cannot focus or put all their attention into a hobby unless everything around them is just so and they feel like they are allowed to give in to some them time.

How about taking a day strictly to be lazy? Sleep in way past your regular wake up time, stay in your jammies, a day full of comfort food, naps, movies and a pvr full of TV shows can be just what the Dr. ordered. How many of us can give over to an entire day where we feel like nothing has been accomplished or has it? Can we not consider recharging an accomplishment?

Then there are those days where we manage to have the perfect combo of it all, I think its learning how to have that perfect balance, like as in everything else in life. The skill to be able to get stuff done around the house, recharge so were ready for the new work week and give a little to ourselves by allowing  for time to do what makes us happy.

We try to pack every moment of our lives but at some point we need to be able to go with the flow and if that flow takes us to a hammock with a book or cutting the lawn so we can play out back with the dog, make sure there is a good balance in the day. Life is not a giant list that needs to be completed, its moments and unknown journeys that we have yet to stumble upon. How can we find new things and explore the unknown when we are micromanaging and planning every moment we have?

We are always getting ready to live but never living. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Lotsa Love,

Tasha

When is enough, enough?

Over the years I have learned that in order for other people to respect me and my boundaries that I have to be the one to respect and obey them first. There are some people in life that give give give and don’t know how to take, others only know how to take and then there are those who have learned the magical balance of boundaries, respect and the fine art of give and take. Where do you fit in all of this and have you learned to respect your own boundaries?

I like to take care of people and as a result of that I was taken advantage of more times than I can count, even from some of my family members who were looking out for themselves. I have since grown a much thicker skin and even though some of my decisions to respect myself and my boundaries hurt me, I know that in the long run its best for me and my overall sanity and well-being.

My mom is one of those people who give and give until there when there is nothing left for her to give, she would then give you the shirt off of her back. She grew up having to be the parent figure in all of her sisters lives and is still trying to be that figure. Unfortunately in some situations she continuously gets hurt and taken advantage of because they know she will always be there and my mom won’t say no.

My mom is one out of five girls in her family and I currently only talking to one of my aunts. My mom and I have had many discussions about this. Her side is always “But they are Family” and mine vary depending on how exhausted I am about the topic or what new mud they are currently dragging my mom through. My overall point to my mom is that because they are family they should treat you better than anyone else, they should have your back, they shouldn’t make you feel bad about yourself and after all the years of constant adoration and support there should be some mutual respect.

I understand family is important, But I believe that the word “Family” is often used as a weapon of guilt and being “Family” is more than just blood.

With everything wrong in the world and everything we go through in our lives True Family supports and cares and will be there for you in a flash if necessary. I may have had to make some hard choices with whom I talk to in my mom’s family, but I am lucky with the ones I still do talk to. They make up for all the other bad and that I am incredibly lucky with the family I married into and my extended family my close knit group of friends that I know without a doubt would have my back in an instant without second thought.

Trust, love and respect are not deserved, they are earned. I’m not saying I’m perfect or that I’m stone cold and cut people off without second thought. My decisions to cut people off from my life have been hard and weigh heavily with me, but I know that I want good things in my life. I want happy times, positive influences and to be able to trust all of those around me.  When it comes down to it you have to put yourself first, protect you and the ones you love. Decide when enough is enough and respect yourself enough to stand by your decisions.

Boundaries and guard rails are there for a reason, to protect us! Live life to the fullest and know when it’s a good thing to step out on the ledge and trust and when it’s time to put the safety guard up and say no!

Lotsa Love,

Tasha

Release

When the tension builds up and you feel stuck, helpless or ready to explode; how do you deal? How do you get release from the pent up anger, frustration or stress?

I used to be horrible at dealing with stress and anger, I would let it bottle up until I couldn’t take it any longer or ignore it all together.  As I got older I realized how ineffective and unhealthy my methods were. I have now learnt to try and resolve the issue and for the ones where there is no resolution or it’s directed at an issue I have no power over to try and use an outlet.

For some people simply running a bath and soaking all the days issues away is resolution enough, they can let the stressors go down the drain after their soak is done. While I do enjoy baths and find them relaxing, they do not give me the kind of release I need when I have pent up issues.

Running has always seemed to be a great de-stressor for me, something about running outside by myself the wind, sun and never ending free space for me to run is an amazing stress reliever for me. It’s like the harder I run the more I’m breaking out of my stress cage and it feel’s great.

Recently my husband purchased a set of throwing knives and anyone who knows me knows I have a strong dislike for knives. I couldn’t figure out what the attraction was until one night after dinner at my in laws all the guys went outside, leaving the girls still sitting at the table, to use the throwing knives (in a safe and controlled environment). At first I had no interest in joining, but then my curiosity took over and I ventured outside. I watched the guys all taking turns and the odd rush they all seemed to be getting from it, so I decided to give it a shot. My first attempt I was nervous and unsure on how they would work or react; this try was not so great. My husband was like “Tash just throw it, give it some muscle” so I did just that I stopped worrying and threw, the knife made a whistle and ended up right into the target and I got this rush, after that every time I threw one I felt a rush of adrenaline and afterwards felt amazingly de-stressed. I think a big part of it was that for me to get into the act I had to release my fear and just go with it and that alone is a great feet.

Now I am not an advocate for violence or violent acts, but I do now have a better understanding for some sports or past times that before unnerved me. I can now see the attraction and am not as closed minded as I may have been before. I realized that just because an item or activity can be used for bad things doesn’t mean that it is a bad thing and that everything is what you make of it.

Sometimes acting "crazy" is the

best way to stay "sane"!

I have also felt a similar feeling while using my sister in laws punching bag, playing paint ball and having play wrestle fights on blow up mattresses with a few friends (sounds crazy but man it’s fun). I think using physical outlets to get rid of mental or emotional stress is completely healthy as long as it stays that way. In no way am I suggesting fighting (unless it’s regulated and in a ring) or releasing aggression on others. I am simply suggesting that physically challenging outlets can be some of the best ways to release. Sometimes all we need is to push our physical limits to be able to relieve tension from our pressed limits mentally.

Find an outlet that works for you and use it appropriately. It can be anything as long as it works for you; De-stress in a bubble bath, run your worries away, journal your thoughts, put on a fat suit and sumo wrestle... No matter how silly or crazy what you’re doing may look (sometimes those are the best ones), find a way to outlet your emotions and keep your mind, body and soul all healthy.

Lotsa Love,

Tasha

Do you have a way to de-stress, unwind or an interesting outlet? Share with us and comment below.

Rut?!?

Do you ever feel like you’re not where you should be, something’s missing or you’re just not happy? It could be that you’re stuck in a rut and just need to find a way out.
 
Sometimes a simple small change can be enough to pull us out and other times a much bigger drastic change is what's needed.
 
It's hard to take a step back and analyze our own lives. Sometimes we've known for a while what needs to change but hide from it. Change isn't always easy, but can be necessary in order to lead a happy, healthy life.
 
We need to be able to acknowledge what the issue is, face it and fix it before we can start climbing out of the rut. There can be a multitude of things that can make us feel down or stuck; sometimes its work, personal or even seasonal. Regardless you need to be the one who wants to change and to initiate it.
 

I think I can....wait...I know I can!

It can be hard to initiate a change, even though we are unhappy, change is different, an unknown and that can be scary. But when it comes down to it what’s scarier, staying in a rut and being unhappy or making a change that may be scary at first but can lead to a happier future?

Not all choices or changes will be right and that’s ok. I know that I have made a couple of wrong ones along the way, but I’ve learnt from them and moved on. I have learnt that I get bored easily and need to feel challenged, so because of that I try new things and try and push myself. We learn from trial and error, where not perfect and we cannot predict the future. So instead learn from mistakes made and celebrate the times you get it right.

We can become very busy looking out for the best interest of everyone else that sometimes we can neglect what it is that we need. We forget that we need to be our very own advocates.

So be your number one fan, celebrate you and fight to be happy, and don’t be afraid to ask for help along the way. Because, even though we need to be the ones to initiate the change some holes are a lot easier to climb out of when you have a rock to tie the rope around.

Lotsa Love,

Tasha

Rainy Days

On days like these where it's raining and cool my first inclination is to stay wrapped in blankets in bed or migrate to the couch with a good book.

Inevitably with spring comes the rain and the days where I struggle most to get out of bed. I find this most prominent when the rain follows a few great sunny days and I have been spoiled by the great weather.

The rain can also make me long for the summer and my cottage. Don't get me wrong sunny cottage days are the best, but there is something special about rainy days at the cottage. We get the wood stove going and everyone finds a couch or jumps into one already occupied for a book reading snuggle fest. On the sunny days we are soak up  every moment outdoors on the dock but mostly in the water. The "relaxing" weekend ends up being busier then some weeks because we are active and motivated to be outside. So when a rainy day comes along and your not at home so you don't have regular chores to preoccupy you, all you have to do is veg. Board games, movies, naps and reading books takes over your day and you get recharged.

So even though I am not particularly fond of the rain, I do have fond memories and look forward to a few special days at my cottage where watches come off and the couch is your home.

There is need for balance in all things we do. It's great to fill your days and go go go, but don't miss out on opportunities  for down time or you time. Allow yourself time to recharge and it will make the rest so much easier to get through.

On the days where you find yourself feeling like you want to do absolutely nothin, instead of feeling guilty, remind yourself that you deserve it every once and awhile and just enjoy the serenity without replaying in your head all the things you could be doing. If you give yourself a chance to recharge, you'll be way more efficient the next time you decide to tackle a big project.

Lotsa Love,
Tasha

Spring Fever

With the smell of barbeques, new bustling in the neighbours yards and the heightened number of people walking this can mean only one thing; Spring Fever!
For those of us that live in areas where it is cold and snowy for half our year, the appearance of grass and sunshine is a thing to be celebrated. The first sign of spring takes barebeques out of the garage, dusty running shoes out of the closet and our itsy bitsy tank tops we’ve been dying to wear again out of storage.
The once restless (done with winter) people put all their pent up energy into getting their yards ready, themselves ready and homes ready for summer time. We burst out of our homes and enjoy the weather. This is actually the topic of conversation for the first few weeks of spring, the weather, people are so happy that the snow is gone that is all they can talk about.
This also triggers the realization that summer is not far away, actually only a few short months away and this is when you see all the walkers and runners emerging prepping for the summer reveal.
I also have a feeling that the beer and wine sales spike the first couple weeks of spring, people busting out the barbeques tends to include an aspect of entertaining (to prove they have not lost their fierce barbequing skills) and celebrating the new found sunny, warm weather.
Finally the end of hibernation is here, for those of us that do not enjoy the cold and the long dark days, it is time to emerge from the darkness and enjoy time outside. Get outside and be active, get the whole family involved. Let your face meet the sun that it has been hidden from since December and get moving.
For those of you who are not fans of winter there is no time to waste, go out there and enjoy it now before it fly’s away. Take your date night outside, join a walking/running group and play with your dog, anything to get you moving again.
Join the spring fever movement, get outside and enjoy life. Who knows what you may discover while you’re out there.

Lotsa Love,
Natasha

My Never-Ending ‘To-Do’ List (Charly)

So with the nice weather that Mother Nature has finally graced us with, I have had the sudden urge to fix everything in my home! I’ve had ideas in my head for a long time I suppose, but now that the weather is nicer I’m more prone to want to follow out the things I want to do because I am finding less and less excuses to put it off. I did a quick to-do list and discovered that “YIKES!” I have enough items that could potentially take me the whole year to complete and that’s barely scratching the surface of what I want done.

I have a tendency of always making these handy little ‘to-do’ lists, but then feeling overwhelmed by them because they encompass everything I want done and then I want to push myself to get them completed in a short time frame. This would be entirely possible if I didn’t have a husband, a full-time job, piano lessons, and family and friends that deserve my attention as well. Even then, who wants to spend their entire life scratching things off their ‘to-do’ lists? I think life should be a little more about spontaneity. I have had the best experiences when I didn’t have a plan. I used to miss out on going places with friends or spending quality time with my husband because I was so focused on all the things I wanted to get done, that I was missing out on the whole part of life: living.

So for all you people out there that are like me and are falling victim to the too-long ‘to-do’ list, do me a favour and throw it away! Don’t set unnecessary pressure on yourself to complete items that you will get to on your own time. If you are really attached to your list, set aside 30-60 minutes a day to work at it, but that’s it. Life is about balance, and that is definitely something I am striving for this year.

Charly

Strip Down

In a world where everyone is categorized and labelled; what are we when where stripped of them? If you’re not a nerd, jock or snob; then what are we? What do we become when we strip down the labels that are not only given to us, but that we give ourselves?

 I have been given many a label and been called many a things, but I always felt that I never fit in just one category, I am a bit of a mix match of everything. Maybe that’s why High School didn’t work for me, because I never fit in one click and depending on the school you go to clicks can be more like gangs then just a group of friends, you can’t mingle with someone wearing a different labelled jean.

I played sports, took dance, gymnastics, musical theatre, took auto mechanics and hung out in the hall way playing cards with my friends on lunch. I play video games, do yoga, drink beer and like dresses. It is easy to see why my mould is a very funny shape.

I can see the allure of wanting to fit into a click, a mould or a label; everyone wants to belong. But at some point we have to step away from those labels and figure out who we are without them. Beneath the job, clothes, money and make up. What are we stripped down?

It’s great to be in the company of people who are their true selves; genuine people, with no agendas or motives to being your friend other than just that; to be your friend.

With the pressure from media and the idea of what “perfect” or “beautiful” is it is great to feel like you can just be you. I frequently go out with no makeup on and encourage my friends to do so all the time. If we cannot feel beautiful in our own skin the when can we? I think that makeup should be an accessory and not a cover up. I think that to be truly beautiful the true you needs to shine through and loving who you are (not in a conceded way) is the absolute best way to do it.

Do I think I’m perfect? Far from it! We all have flaws, but I have accepted mine. Stripping down to the real you is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself. Because over time things can get really piled up and we can feel weighed down.  Well you’re the only one who can strip them off, so what will it be? Labels and uncomfortable moulds or freedom to be you?

Go ahead; you know you want to.... just STRIP!

Lotsa Love,

Tasha

Getting back on the horse

Spring has sprung and with it all the outdoor runners; which I was a member of until I feel off the wagon and then got run over by it. Today I decided to get back up on that horse and go after my goal.

I have waivered back and forth when it has come to leading a healthy lifestyle; different eating styles, Pilates, yoga, circuit training, running…etc… But one undeniable fact that always comes from these waivers is that I feel 100% better when I am leading a better lifestyle. I have more energy and my mood is always improved. So why do I fall off the horse?

It’s easy to blame schedules, life changes or anything else we can think of. For me It takes me a while to get hooked to being active, but after a while I get addicted to it, I need to be doing it. However falling off the horse is a much quicker action. This can happen from missing a single day of exercise.

I think that my reasoning is I try to do everything all at once; I go from zero to sixty in the blink of an eye and don’t give myself enough time to make life changes instead of quick diet decisions. One thing I know for sure is that since the weather has been getting nicer I have been itching to get out, so maybe a little did stick last time.

So today instead of doing what I normally try and do which would be going out first time of the season and try and run 8k, I took my dog out for a quick power walk around our little town and ended up feeling great about it. My first instinct was to immediately restrict my calories to see bigger results faster, but instead I am going to watch what I eat and make smart meal choices, cut out the obviously bad foods a little at a time.

I hiked all through Costa Rica, including a volcano.
I can do anything...right?

I have had this goal stuck in my head for years now and I am tired of looking back at old calendars with the date circled of when I was to achieve this goal. So I am going to reach it, I am going to take my baby steps and work my way to my goal, because I deserve it.

I think sometimes we want something so bad we don’t want to work for it or we want it right now and then it’s easy to get discouraged because not all goals are attainable overnight. Make sure that when you’re setting goals there attainable so that you’re not setting yourself up for a big disappointment. Enjoy the ride along the way and learn from every up and down.

Because, no matter what your goals do not define you; you define your goals. 

Lotsa Love,

Tash